Hi Reader, This week’s small-but-mighty email opens with J.R.R. Tolkien on being overlooked: Deeds will not be less valiant because they’re unpraised. (Aragorn, The Return of the King) Husband and fellow warrior-king, Keep doing the right thing because it’s the right thing. Keep doing the right thing because that’s the kind of man you are. Put a knife to the throat of neediness. Needing your wife to notice, thank, or praise you for your benevolent deed. Otherwise, your good deed turns rancid...

Hi Reader, Last week, one of the men in my private community (we’ll call him Dan) shared a story that will dramatically improve your marriage. Here’s what happened … Dan is chillin’ with his family when his cell phone rings. It’s their next-door neighbor. During the course of the phone call, Dan is gracious, kind, patient, and attentive. Like he’s filming a telephone etiquette video for Dale Carnegie’s How to Win Friends and Influence People. The call ends and Dan’s wife — stunned by the...

Hi Reader, When you think of your marriage, it’s unlikely your mind goes to the second law of thermodynamics (or law of entropy), but it needs to. Otherwise, you risk losing the people you love most. In physics, the law of entropy says that all systems, left unattended, will run down. Unless new energy is pumped in, the organism will disintegrate. Entropy is at work in many areas other than physics. I see it, for instance, when I work with couples whose marriages are in trouble. A marriage...